http://www.vmyths.com/rant.cfm?id=373&page=4 by Rob Rosenberger 08/18/01 A WALL STREET Journal reporter filed a story yesterday about Code Red. Not the worm -- the soft drink. I quote: When two Orange County, Calif., computer programmers last month named a computer virus they had discovered "Code Red," after the cherry soda they had been chugging, they gave PepsiCo's new soft drink global brand recognition money can't buy. The supersweet, cherry-flavored brand extension of Mountain Dew, which hit shelves in May, became the fifth-most-popular soft drink sold at convenience stores and gas stations in July. That's a feat, considering Code Red is only available in single-serve sizes and has yet to be advertised on television. Ryan Permeh, a programmer at eEye Digital Security, Aliso Viejo, Calif., says he and his colleague ["chief hacking officer" Marc Maiffret] were "inches away" from calling the new virus they discovered the "tequila worm"... PepsiCo later sent Permeh and the other programmer five cases of Code Red in appreciation. Awww, how nice! PepsiCo sent five cases of soda to eEye as a token of appreciation. I'm glad somebody outside the security industry profited from the predicted "meltdown" of the Internet. Did I mention Mello Yello is the official soft drink of Vmyths.com? You can hear a plug for it (complete with burp) in one of my recent audio columns. Yes, when I'm done ranting about an elitist antivirus cartel that rules the computing world in conjunction with an incompetent government agency that uses the media in order to keep people stupid, my throat gets parched! That's why I drink Mello Yello. [Credit where due: I stole the "throat gets parched" joke from the late comedian Bill Hicks.] Memo to Coca-Cola Inc.: please send a token of appreciation to Vmyths.com Product Placement Dept., 68 Cumberland St., Suite 300, P.O. Box 748, Woonsocket, RI 02895. A stack of two-liter coupons will suffice. Naturally, PepsiCo isn't alone when it comes to "beneficial" computer security threats. The Kournikova virus did more for Anna Kournikova's career than her bra endorsement ever did. Every savvy female college tennis player now wants a deadly ber-virus named after her. Memo to Sammy Hagar: you gotta admit I did a great job when I linked the phrase "tequila worm" (see above) to your "red rocker" tequila page. Code Red, red rocker, get it? Please send your token of appreciation to the same addr-- no waitaminit, send it directly to me instead. Vmyths.com Editorial Dept., 214 8th Avenue S., P.O. Box 50, Wellman, IA 52356. One autographed bottle will suffice. I can't wait to discover another computer security threat of my very own. I think I'll name it "the De Beers virus" -- those folks will show they love me for the next thousand years... SPEAKING OF ENDORSEMENTS: I'd like to take a moment to talk about LogiCerv and their unique QuadCerv box. They squeezed four independent servers into a 1U rackmount chassis. Four monitors, four keyboards, four mice, and four Ethernet jacks all connect to a 1U chassis. Look to LogiCerv when space is a limiting factor. Okay, we got that endorsement[1] out of the way! Memo to LogiCerv: please send four tokens of appreciation (that's 16 servers total) to our editorial address. While you're at it, why don't you toss in a prototype 1U rackmount 800GB NAS device? Memo to Network Associates: thank you for your $1,000 token of appreciation. Memo to Ann's Bra Shop: you'll find a link to your website on this page, plus here and here. No need to thank me -- it was good for me, too! If anything, I should thank you for "erecting" those billboards near St. Louis. Hmmm. You know, eEye & I could make it easier to receive tokens of appreciation if we started our own Amazon.com wish lists... [1] http://vmyths.com/rant.cfm?id=374&page=4 8/18/01 clarification by Vea Culpa Rob Rosenberger's 8/18/01 column included humorous unsolicited endorsements for various products. Neither Vmyths.com nor Rosenberger has a quid pro quo relationship with any company mentioned in the column. Full disclosure: one of the mentioned companies (LogiCerv) learned of Rosenberger's latest antivirus experiment through a third party. The firm approached him early this year with the idea of sponsoring his project. A quid pro quo relationship may someday form between Rosenberger & LogiCerv. - ISN is currently hosted by Attrition.org To unsubscribe email majordomoat_private with 'unsubscribe isn' in the BODY of the mail.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b30 : Fri Aug 24 2001 - 04:01:55 PDT