CRIME generic worm alert.

From: tobyhush@private
Date: Sun Feb 02 2003 - 13:36:40 PST

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    Whee... Everyone remember Mad Libs? :-)
    
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    Date: Thu, 30 Jan 2003 10:07:53 -0800
    From: Jeremy Epstein <jeremy.epstein@private>
    Subject: Pete Lindstrom's parametric worm warning
    
      [From Pete Lindstrom, Spire Security, petelind@private]
    
    *<Adjective> Computer Worm <verb> Internet*
    
    In the wee hours of <date>, a <adjective> computer worm spread <adverb>
    throughout the Internet. Dubbed <silly name> because <ridiculous reason
    that doesn't explain anything about how it works>, and also known as
    <another random name> and <another random name>, the worm has infected
    an estimated <number> systems within <length of time>. Experts are
    calling this worm the most <adjective> since <date in the past>.
    
    The worm exploits a hole in <Microsoft product name> that was first
    identified <number> months ago by <security company name>. In an attempt
    to secure the planet, <same company> released detailed information about
    the vulnerability and how to exploit it. They also mentioned how to fix
    it, but apparently <noun> listened. Coincidentally, the worm that
    exploited this hole was also first identified by <same company>. Even
    more coincidentally, they make a product to protect against <noun>.
    
    "Actually, it's not really a <noun>, it's a <noun>," said <Pete
    Lindstrom, or some other person seeking publicity>. " A true <noun>
    works by <random filler that nobody will read>."
    
    The worm's payload <verb> every system by <verb ending in -ing> the
    <noun>. Comparatively speaking, this is much worse than <another worm>
    but not as bad as <another worm>. The computers of <place> were hit the
    hardest. Current damage is estimated at <dollar figure more than the GNP
    of two-thirds of the world's nations>. " This worm has the potential to
    <something or other>," said <Pete Lindstrom, or some other person trying
    hard to come up with something interesting to say ;-)>. " It just goes
    to show you that <another something or other>."
    
    Though there is no way to protect against this particular bug, experts
    recommend trying <longshot one> or <longshot two>, neither of which
    matter, since nobody will do it anyway.
    
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