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Date: Tue Jun 29 2004 - 18:32:52 PDT

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    One day a boy came to his teacher and said:" Teacher, pa wants to know if
    you like roast pig.""I certainly do," said the teacher, "and you tell your
    father he is very kind to think of me."Days passed, and nothing more was
    said about the roast pig.Finally the teacher said to the boy:"I thought your
    father was going to send me over some roast pig.""Yes," said the boy, "he
    did intend to, but the pig sot well."
    A local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around
    that they offered a standing $1,000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon
    until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone
    who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many
    people had tried over time (weightlifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody
    could do it. One day a scrawny little man wearing thick glasses and a
    polyester suit came in and said in a tiny, squeaky voice, "I'd like to try
    the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said okay, grabbed
    a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind
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    man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As
    the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1,000, and asked the little man,
    "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weightlifter, or
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