[Politech] TSA adds teenagers to prohibited items list (satire) [priv]

From: Declan McCullagh (declan@private)
Date: Tue Mar 15 2005 - 21:24:38 PST


See:
http://216.71.84.120/e/p/tp-20050311-71.html

s/teenagers/lighters/

-Declan

-------- Original Message --------
Subject: TSA Adds Teenagers to Prohibited Items List
Date: Tue, 15 Mar 2005 10:47:36 -0800
From: John Gilmore <gnu@private>
To: declan@private, gnu@private

TSA Public Affairs
  (571) 227-2829

TSA Adds Teenagers to List of Items Prohibited Beyond Airport Checkpoints

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) today
announced that all teenagers will be prohibited from sterile areas of
airports and onboard aircraft.  This action is in response to a provision
in the Intelligence Reform and Terrorism Prevention Act of 2004, which was
signed into law by the President on December 17, 2004, and requires that
"troubled" teenagers be added to TSA’s Prohibited Items List.

After carefully evaluating the security threat, Congressional intent
and operational considerations, TSA determined that passengers should
be prohibited from bringing teenagers with them, or in carry-on
luggage, in the sterile areas of airports or onboard an airplane. The
policy will be fully enforced beginning April 11, 2005, the 4-1/2 year
anniversary of 9/11.

"TSA is moving quickly to implement this provision passed by Congress,"
said Rear Adm. David M. Stone, USN (Ret.), Assistant Secretary of Homeland
Security for TSA.  "By creating policy to add teenagers to the Prohibited
Items List we are closing a potential vulnerability in air travel
security."

The agency also acknowledged the role passengers play in making the
security process go more smoothly.

"Travelers are a valuable partner in the screening process," said Rear
Adm. Stone. "If they pack smart and avoid bringing teenagers to the
checkpoint, passengers can accelerate the screening process and allow
us to focus on those remaining individuals and items that may be a
threat to their flight."

All teenagers will be banned from sterile areas beyond security
checkpoints at airports.  This includes, for example, polite
teenagers, surly teenagers, sleepy teenagers, teenagers in groups,
teenagers traveling with parents, teenagers traveling alone, and
adults or children who look or act like teenagers.  Air marshals,
government officials, and screeners are exempt from the ban.

TSA’s mission includes preventing air piracy and use of an airplane as a
weapon.  TSA prohibits items that may be used to that end from being
brought aboard an airplane.  The teenager ban will fulfill Congress’ intent
as expressed in the Intelligence Reform and Terrorism Prevention Act and
reduce security vulnerabilities, providing one more layer of security for
the nation’s travelers.

The Department of Transportation classifies teenagers as hazardous and
explosive, and prohibits them from being stowed in checked baggage.
TSA will dispose of teenagers brought to checkpoints.  Passengers at
some airports may be able to ship their teenagers via a private company for
a fee, but TSA strongly urges passengers to thoroughly inspect their
party and leave their 'teens' at home before going to the airport.

For more information regarding TSA, please visit our Web site at
www.tsa.gov.


# # #


You received this email because you are subscribed as
jenna@private

To unsubscribe from this newsletter please click on the link below:

https://cas.tsa.dot.gov/MailList/Mailform/UnsubscribeForm.asp

_______________________________________________
Politech mailing list
Archived at http://www.politechbot.com/
Moderated by Declan McCullagh (http://www.mccullagh.org/)



This archive was generated by hypermail 2.1.3 : Tue Mar 15 2005 - 21:49:55 PST