I post this here because a) I think it's funny and b) overpopulation
is a problem which information warfare can solve, through social
engineering, advertisement (i.e. propaganda), and widespread, open
access to information.
Thoughts on Birth Control and Population:
Is there an alternative to mass destruction?
(An informal and entirely hypothetical Discussion between various
Philosophical Figureheads and Great Thinkers)
by Mark Hedges
Written originally for an Ethics and Society class at UCSD under
the direction of Patricia Smith Churchland in 1994
"What a beautiful day!" I said to myself, wheeling my bike out of
the garage. "Perfect day for a ride!" A few little fluffy clouds
crossed the deep blue of the sky -- it reminded me of Arizona, for
some reason. They had an almost blue tint to them, they looked like
great clouds of smoke coming out of some massive Pipe just over the
horizon. I rode my bike down to Henry Cowell park and took off
through the redwoods on a roughly-hewn trail. Birds were chirping,
a few deer were out -- one could hardly tell that cities or people
even existed in the world at all. The trail led down to Powder Mill
Creek, where I stopped and began to unpack my small lunch. As I was
unpeeling my banana, I heard some voices raised in discussion
around a bend in the creek. Not used to finding this many people so
deep in the woods, I took my banana and investigated.
Turning aside a large bunch of fern fronds, I came upon a most
peculiar assort ment of six people sitting on logs or standing.
There were two men in tailored suits, one man in jeans and a
flannel shirt, a woman in similar attire, the Pope, and a kind-
looking man with a wonderfully disturbing smile and a huge Ward
Cleaverish tobacco pipe hooked in his ever-present grin. He nodded
at me and motioned me to be silent a moment. I obliged.
Pope John Paul II was softly saying to the woman, "I am simply
trying to convince you that the conception of life is a beautiful
and holy thing in and of itself, and that any attempt to block the
creation of a life during intercourse is an attack on life itself
in its -- hmm, hello there." At this point the consortium turned to
me with puzzled looks.
"Who are you?" said the woman.
"Uhh..." was all I could manage at the time.
"Hello, son!" said the man with the Pipe. "Welcome to this fine
discussion! Oh, good, I see you've brought the banana. Give it
here, son." I handed the banana to the man. He proceeded to eat it,
taking occasional puffs on his pipe. His face was astonishing -- it
was perfectly cut in every way. He almost looked as if he was one
of those little plastic snap-together models I played with as a
child. His snappy suit looked as if it were part of his body, and
his hair was a solid, smooth mass atop his head.
After a moment he realized that everyone was staring at him for an
explanation. "Oh, errrŠeveryone, I'd like you to meet Mark, Mark,
this is everyone." He proceeded with introductions. The men in
suits were William Aiken and Garrett Hardin, the man in flannel was
Aldo Leopold, the woman was Ronnie Zoe Hawkins, and the Pope was,
of course, the Pope. "Oh, and I suppose you know, but you can call
me "Bob"." The quotation marks around his name were almost audible.
He finished the banana and handed me the peel. "Thanks!" He smiled
his most effervescent smile.
"Well, let's get back to it. Mark, thanks for joining us, we're
discussing the issue of contraception and whether it should be
widely available to women across the world. Back to you, Karol." It
occurred to me just then that "Bob" was standing behind a cut stump
of a small redwood which acted as a small podium -- it also
occurred to me that "Bob" would perhaps make the best debate
director in the world.
The Pope straightened his ornate white and gold robes and
continued. "I really have only a few points to discuss. First, you
must accept that the bond of marriage is handed down through the
Church by God Himself. In it are two people, a man and a woman, and
they generate offspring. When a husband and wife engage in sexual
intercourse it is not a bad or evil thing; indeed sex within
marriage serves to bring the husband and wife closer together in
joy and pleasure. Second, I want you to realize that sexual
intercourse and activity has the final purpose of the Creation of
Life." At this remark "Bob" took out a small plastic bag from his
jacket and reloaded his Pipe. It somehow lit itself and he
proceeded to take an enormous puff.
"One of the final purposes in mar riage as outlined by God is this
as well. If a man and a woman create life when they are married,
this is a fine and beautiful thing. If a man and a woman engage in
sexual promiscuity when they are not married, however -- this is a
sin of the body and is not for the purpose of creating life."
One of the men in the suits, Aiken, speaks up at this point. "Well,
why can't it be? Why can't a man and a woman have sex when they are
not married and have a child?"
The Pope, with a confident look on his face, responded. "God tells
us that sex within marriage is a sacrament of the Covenant between
Christ and the Church, and that sex outside of marriage is a sin
and should be condemned. Children conceived outside of wedlock are
illegitimate."
"Those filthy rotten BASTARDS! Excommunicate the worthless kids!"
Dobbs' cheery grin took everyone by surprise after this remark.
"How dare you attack children in this way! They're innocent, for
Christ's sake! Sweet Jesus, save them from this horrible slander!"
The Pope visibly cringed at "Bob's" language. "I did not mean to
suggest, "Bob", that the children were at fault for their sins," he
responded, "merely that their parents had passed their sin on to
them. Marital love is the true authentic love as decreed by God.
Husband and wife should take joy procreating together and know that
they are following the Will of God. If a couple acts in any way to
prevent the creation of life, they are deliberately revolting
against God's Will." (Lawler, "Catholic Sexual Ethics" was used as
the primary source of the Pope's views. See bibliography.)
At this point "Bob" blurted out, "Perhaps that's true, but is that
really the issue here? I mean, all this Capital Letter Talk is fine
and good, but perhaps you should consider that Yahweh has more
goals than just the procreation of the human species in individual
cases. I mean, what if he wants the species as a whole to continue
and perpetuate itself as long as possible? What if he wants life as
a whole to continue and perpetuate itself as long as possible? What
if, by refusing to limit the human population on the earth, we
drive the rest of earthly life and subsequently ourselves into
oblivion?"
Hawkins picked up from there. "That's a very valid consideration,
"Bob", and one to which I've given a considerable amount of
thought." Her commanding gaze controlled the audience, except for
"Bob", who wandered off up into the trees to urinate. "It has only
been recently in our history, and by that I mean within the last
few hundred years, that the human population has swelled to such
exceedingly incomprehensible numbers as it is today. Before 1800
there were only a few hundred million people in the world or less,
sparsely scattered across the globe. Today, there are upwards of 5
billion people! In our past people have been able to survive solely
on what they find on the land around them or in the sea, today the
human race depends on extracting the highest yield possible from
the environment. It is at best unclear what the limit of natural
resources is which we can use. Our overwhelming consumption of the
planet has impeded the life cycles of countless other species,
probably even species we do not know exist or existed.
"There is evidence here and now which suggests that the human
population is totally out of control. At the current rate, our
numbers are doubling every 41 years. (Hawkins, "Reproductive
Choices: The Ecological Dimension") About 20% of humans live in
desperate poverty, and about half of those have no means nor
opportunities whatsoever to elevate themselves into a higher
standard of living. The nations of the world which are experiencing
this extreme population growth are looking toward any means to
either control their growth or feed their starving people, and they
cannot be blamed. Brazil is decimating its own rain forests so it
can graze and sell cattle to the industrialized nations to generate
money to feed its people. China is attempting mass birth control,
child limitations, and now is even considering eugenics to 'weed
out' genetic deficiencies."
The Pope gasps loudly. "Surely you don't mean to suggest that you
support the killing of babies if they exhibit certain traits or
characteristics?!" Aiken and Hardin stirred from their resting
place on their log. Leopold cocked an eyebrow at Hawkins. Dobbs,
back from his excursion into the woods, smiled dumbly and sat down.
"I'm not saying I support anything or am against anything for human
moral purposes. I'm coming at this issue from a strictly
environmental viewpoint, to present an opposing opinion. My point
is, if contraceptive means are not used to lower the birthrate, we
will become so massive as a species that we will push all of the
rest of the world into death. If the rest of life on earth were to
die, we would surely die too."
"I agree with you that the population on the planet is an extreme
and pressing problem," inputs Hardin, "but your approach to the
problem is all wrong. The situation as it is now is this: Some
humans, those in the industrialized nations, have started to
realize the folly in a huge human population. This is shown by your
figures, Ms. Hawkins, the more developed regions of the world
average a population doubling of about 148 years. ("Reproductive
Choices", p. 391 of VanDeVeer and Pierce text) If the rest of the
world does not realize that they need to cut down on their
populations, they will overbreed and die off due to famines and
plagues. This is a harsh philosophy, but it is the way nature
works. We should not succumb to the temptation, yes, the temptation
to help out those starving in the poor countries. If we do this, we
are only perpetuating the problem and cutting our own throats. By
giving of ourselves to bail out the overpopulated, overpolluted,
overburdened countries we will not be able to survive the future
impact of this destruction. (Hardin, "Lifeboat Ethics") From this
respect, if overpopulated nations were to have the knowledge and
means of using birth control, it would be theoretically possible
for the poor nations to pull themselves out of their increasing
dilemma and risk of utter destruction."
Aiken ran his hand through his hair and said to Hardin, "That is
absolutely ludicrous. You're extending the artificial limits of a
nation's boundary lines to define a false system which you insist,
wrongly, must be self-sufficient. You are a whining, fat and
overfed dog who is resentful of the starving street dogs who kill
for scraps of meat from a butcher."
"Whoa, hold on there friends," said Dobbs. "Let's be civil, at
least, or we might find ourselves back in time when people used to
kill each other for the time of day!"
"Sorry," said Aiken, "but that approach to the population problem
is selfish and wrong."
"I would have to agree with the young man Aiken on that point,"
said the Pope.
I put in my two bits. "Me too." I suppose in the wake of such a
collection of massive intellect, my brain was just plain
overwhelmed, and I couldn't add much input of my own into the
conversation.
"At any rate," continued Aiken, "he is assuming that the only
controlling factor in where humans can and cannot live is the
immediate availability of food. (Aiken, "The 'Carrying Capacity'
Equivocation") As is easily demonstrated by nations such as the
members of O.P.E.C., food is most definitely not the controlling
factor which decides if a nation can feed its people. With money
and power in the international system comes the ability to survive.
The members of O.P.E.C., for example, are able to import food to
eat because they export a highly valuable commodity, oil. Without
oil they could never survive in such high numbers in the desert,
but with oil and the power it gives them they flourish."
Aldo Leopold stood up from his rest atop a high stump. He clambered
slowly down, and began to talk. "I tend to view this from both a
more humanitarian, and a more ecological point of view. Humans
today have exceeded their boundaries in population because they
have isolated themselves from the world around them and convinced
themselves they are not a part of it. The land is only property to
many people, and even the air and water around the land are claimed
by the countries of the world. Throughout our lives today in
western society we are taught that humans are special in some way
because we have conquered Nature. We have to work to change that.
(Leopold, "The Land Ethic") I am not saying, William, that the
member nations of O.P.E.C. give up drilling for oil, I am saying
that they should remember that they do have a duty to the world in
which they live.
"We owe it to the world to lower our rate of growth and eventually
to lower our total population. Humans are most definitely an
integral part of the world environment; I do not believe that any
of you make arguments against this fact. Therefore, we owe it to
ourselves to save our fellow members of the world ecosystem from
the disaster we have created. If contraceptive devices were widely
available and used, the population would be reduced. This is not an
issue. We agree that the population must be reduced or eventually
one of two things will happen: either we will live miserable lives
with 40 billion people on our planet by the end of the twenty-first
century, or massive numbers of people will perish horribly from
starvation and disease. The question is, should we use
contraception widely in the world or choose from the consequences?"
"Only through God can the world be saved," said the Pope. "Through
Christ's teachings and the doctrines of the Church, the people of
the world can find the inspiration and the love for life to control
their own procreation. You are all speaking as if all humans do is
engage in sexual intercourse and nothing can be done about that.
This is not true. Something can be done. Through God, we can attain
the self-discipline and self-respect necessary to turn down the
temptation of sex. Husbands and wives can find the knowledge,
through the Church, to abstain from having sex and thus reduce the
population. It is not necessary to abandon the Scriptures and use
the evil of contraception to limit growth and preserve our planet.
We can do this with God, Christ, and the Church."
"But we can also do it cheaply and easily with birth control and
easy-to-get abortions! Why should we not do it this way?"
questioned Hawkins.
The Pope countered, "The easiest path itself often leads to death
and destruction."
"So does the hardest! It doesn't matter! We are in a desperate
situation which requires desperate measures to recover!" Hawkins
was visibly agitated.
The talking paused spontaneously for a moment. "Seven minute
conversation lull!" I cried. I received some rather odd stares.
"Dobbs, what do you think of all this?" said Hardin. Should we
attempt at all to lower the population growth of the poorer nations
of the world?"
"Bob" smiled greatly and took a puff from his pipe. "Well, you
know, Garrett, things generally work out for the best anyway...
perhaps in this case we should just sit back and relax and enjoy
the ride, whether we're going to Heaven, or Hell, or just
Cleveland."
"And abandon all thought of the innocent people on the planet who
are being corrupted by the evil of birth control?" asked the Pope.
"And those who are dying of starvation and poisoning from the
pollution in their environment because birth control is not
available?" asked Hawkins.
"And totally disregard our responsibility and our duty to the earth
on which we live and the other creatures we live with?" gasped
Leopold.
"By doing so, even if we in the industrialized nations survive,
countless billions of people may die!" exclaimed Hardin. I could
hear Aiken mutter "Shut up, fool." under his breath.
"Yeah, "Bob"," I said, "that would really suck."
"Well," he said, "you know, things always seem to work themselves
out in the end...at least for me anyway. Relax, all of you! You
make such a big deal over -- what were we talking about? The fate
of the world and all the life in it? Well, you win some and you
lose some, that's what I always say. If we get to the end of the
world and all is destroyed, well, we've had one hell of a party
doing it! On the other hand, if the world manages to survive and
people get their acts together and all that, well, we've had one
hell of a party doing that too!" The smoke from the Pipe drifted
around the crowd. It seemed to have a soothing effect; they weren't
quite as worried. I wasn't very worried, either, for that matter. I
was quite giddy, in fact. The people all turned to "Bob". "Bob"
smiled and charisma seemed to ooze from his mold-pressed skin.
"Well, I guess that wraps it up then! Thanks for coming, everyone,
I hope you all had a nice time. Errr, sorry I forgot the donuts."
"Well, that's okay, "Bob", sins can be forgiven...." There seemed
to be a particularly large cloud of the mystical smoke around the
Pope as he uttered those words. The smoke around the people got so
thick I could barely see them, and eventually I lost track
altogether of where everyone was. When the smoke cleared, there was
no one there except "Bob".
"Well, son, what did you think?" asked Dobbs.
"I'm not sure, it's sort of hard to decide. I thought Leopold was a
likable fellow, he had some really valuable things to say. Aiken
was pretty much just reacting to Hardin most of the time, and
Hardin himself was pretty biased and self-centered about the whole
thing. Hawkins' fervent desire to reduce the population is probably
due to her proclaimed abandonment of the human-centered side of the
argument."
Now that the smoke had cleared it seemed I had some things to say.
"I felt the Pope had some very valuable advice. Why should we jump
immediately to using artificial means of preventing excessive
births? We aren't incapable of overcoming our lust for sex."
"Well...I guess..." started "Bob". "But sex is so much damn fun!
I'd really be missing a lot if I didn't get laid."
"Okay, point taken. Though it might be the ideal, I don't think one
can realistically expect everyone in the world to join the Catholic
Church and abstain from sex unless married and financially and
ethically capable of raising children. All the same, extremes such
as China's eugenics proposals should be countered by something. I
was about to say 'countered by some force of morality', but who
would that be? The United Nations? That organization is essentially
controlled by the United States; I don't want one rich country's
views being pressed on everyone else.
"I don't see abortion as being as morally correct as pre-
intercourse contraception like the pill or methods such as condoms
or diaphragms. I personally recognize an embryo/fetus as, if not a
full-fledged human life, at least the possibility of a life. But I
don't really like to think my species is in all ways the best on
the planet. We are certainly the most intelligent, the most
adaptive, and the most handy with tools; but are we the most
physically strong? Are we the most beautiful? Are we the wisest? We
certainly don't have the biggest brains, or the most self-
sufficient bodies or even the most dexterous appendages. Our self-
importance rises from the fact that we are currently and
coincidentally the most dominant species on earth. A hundred
million years ago, the dinosaurs were. A hundred million years from
now, most likely, another species will be. For this time, we are
dominant -- while we are here we have an obligation, just like
every other species does, to be responsible in our individual
actions to the greater good of the ecosystem. If we ignore this
duty we will perish."
"Well, that's nice, I guess," said "Bob". He reached inside his
jacket for another load from the plastic baggy. He took another few
puffs and inhaled deeply. "Ahhhhh. That's better. Oh my, I almost
forgot! I have to go kill Hitler! I'll see you around, Mark, thanks
for coming! It was a real pleasure, honestly." He reached out his
hand toward me.
I grabbed his hand and shook it. I was overwhelmed with the aura
immediately surrounding "Bob's" skin. I fainted and fell to the
ground in a swoon.
When I woke up, it was the late afternoon, and I was ravenously
hungry. I finished my lunch sitting among the redwoods and carried
my bike up the hill back to my house. I'd had an eventful day.
BOBLIOGRAPHY
Aiken, William; "The 'Carrying Capacity' Equivocation"; The
Environmental Ethics and Policy Book, VanDeVeer and Pierce,
ITP/Wadsworth 1994; pp. 384-389. (Original essay from Social Theory
and Practice, Spring 1980)
Hardin, Garrett; "Lifeboat Ethics"; The Environmental Ethics and
Policy Book, VanDeVeer and Pierce, ITP/Wadsworth 1994; pp. 378-383.
(Original essay from Psychology Today, 1974)
Hawkins, Ronnie Zoe; "Reproductive Choices: The Ecological
Dimension"; The Environmental Ethics and Policy Book, VanDeVeer and
Pierce, ITP/Wadsworth 1994; pp. 390-400. (Original essay from APA
Newsletters, Spring 1992)
Lawler, Ronald David; Boyle, Joseph M., Jr.; and May, William E.;
Catholic Sexual Ethics: a Summary, Explanation, and Defense;
Huntington, Ind., Our Sunday Visitor 1985
Leopold, Aldo; "The Land Ethic"; The Environmental Ethics and
Policy Book, VanDeVeer and Pierce, ITP/Wadsworth 1994; pp. 138-147.
(Original essay from A Sand County Almanac... by Aldo Leopold,
Oxford University Press)
Stang, Reverend Ivan, Ed.; Three-Fisted Tales of "Bob": Short
Stories in the SubGenius Mythos with commentary by the editor;
Fireside/Simon & Schuster Inc. 1990. pp. 11-23.
Stang, Reverend Ivan, "The Third Fist"; Three-Fisted Tales of
"Bob"; Simon & Schuster 1990 pp. 38-90.
Stang, Reverend Ivan; The Book of the SubGenius; Simon & Schuster
1984.
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